Stand By Me

As I began to write down the things in my heart this morning, this song came to me. And I googled the lyrics because I did not trust memory to recite them.

Words and music by Charles A. Tindley:

1.
When the storms of life are raging,
Stand by me (stand by me);
When the storms of life are raging,
Stand by me (stand by me);
When the world is tossing me
Like a ship upon the sea
Thou Who rulest wind and water,
Stand by me (stand by me).

2.
In the midst of tribulation,
Stand by me (stand by me);
In the midst of tribulation,
Stand by me (stand by me);
When the hosts of hell assail,
And my strength begins to fail,
Thou Who never lost a battle,
Stand by me (stand by me).

3.
In the midst of faults and failures,
Stand by me (stand by me);
In the midst of faults and failures,
Stand by me (stand by me);
When I do the best I can,
And my friends misunderstand,
Thou Who knowest all about me,
Stand by me (stand by me).

4.
In the midst of persecution,
Stand by me (stand by me);
In the midst of persecution,
Stand by me (stand by me);
When my foes in battle array
Undertake to stop my way,
Thou Who savèd Paul and Silas,
Stand by me (stand by me).

5.
When I’m growing old and feeble,
Stand by me (stand by me);
When I’m growing old and feeble,
Stand by me (stand by me);
When my life becomes a burden,
And I’m nearing chilly Jordan,
O Thou “Lily of the Valley,”
Stand by me (stand by me).

This morning as my husband and I sat before the wood burning stove watching the fire and mulling over the beginnings of the day, I slipped in the last CD of Jan Karon's Book, "In the Company of Others." As always we listened captivated by the beauty and flow of a woman author that has become like a mentor to us in so many ways. God has such a beautiful way of using people, books, events or anything he chooses to touch our hearts. Today he used Jan Karon once more to open our hearts to Him and give us insight to where real peace and joy come from which of course is our Savior Jesus Christ. From our Lord comes healing, forgiveness, a newness of life that only comes from his love and guidance.

In a perfect world we could just follow the Lord in all our ways and trust in Him completely and never would we dash our foot on a stone or be alone or sink into a depression or lack of faith. However, we are humans and we are frail and it is our destiny to fail.

I wish I had the power, let me rephrase that, I wish the Lord would grant me the power to speak in a way of His love and faithfulness to me that would inspire others to walk in the light as he is in the light. I wish I would always have that power. As my husband pointed out God has already given us that power, but we just need to receive it and use it for him. But because I cannot achieve that goal completely, will not keep me from striving for complete obedience and run the race as Paul did until the Lord calls me home. And I have learned in even this attempt I must come to him in prayer and by faith and follow him in order to run that race and complete that goal. There is no power within myself.

God has used Jan Karon and Beth Moore to make my life better and also has given me the greatest blessing of all in that my husband can share with me what is given to me even when it reaches his heart in a different way at times. Beth Moore has led me to the Lord through her way of teaching and the experiences she shares in her life that touch the marrow of my bones. Jan Karon has given me the inspiration to reach higher in my desire to reach others with optimism, hope and joy and doing it through the words that only God could deliver to another soul.

I have come to know that each of these women will not be used to reach others as they have been used to reach me, however should I have the ability to pass along the joy and happiness they have brought into my life perhaps someone else would also be touched by them through God in what ever matter he chose to reach them. Therefore, I will continue to do my best to pass along what has been given to me.

Is not our life to be passed along to others? Are we simply put here on this earth to muddle along and live the roller coaster of life alone and not touch or change someones life in the journey?

I think our purpose is to touch others lives for Christ. Perhaps our experiences will glorify God through all our miserable attempts. The scripture from James came to my mind,
"Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness, neither shadow of turning." James 1:17 Every good gift. Jan Karon and Beth Moore are good gifts.

When I pass from this life I want it to be said of me that I passed the good gift of Christ to others. Not anything in me, but in my willingness to serve and glorify my Lord. It is very difficult to keep the Me out of glorifying Christ. I just want to be said to have been a vessel he used. I can guarantee from the very depth of my soul that there is nothing good in me, but the Holy Spirit that indwells me.

My personal Tribute to Wayne Cooley

A TRIBUTE TO WAYNE COOLEY

This is a paragraph out of my study that just summed up what we feel about the life of Wayne. He left behind a true testimony of living the abundant life right up till the time he walked into the arms of Jesus.
...
"The apostle Paul desired to rearrange our thinking on that. The abundant life is not when no impossible situations occur and you're experiencing peace, joy and happiness. While that's nice, true abundance is really seen when you're sitting in a prison circumstance, when you're eye to eye with an impossible situation, and right in the heart of your impossible, you experience the fullness of god. when like Paul, we can pour out our honor and praise upon God and maybe even write a doxology of our own in spite of what we're going through--that, my friend, is the abundant life." copied from "Faithful, Abundant, and True." Priscilla Shirer.

This morning I felt the desire to share these thoughts on Face book because I know Wayne's family are all on there. He was an inspiration to all of us during his fight with cancer. I will write more when we return from our trip to Thanksgiving dinner with Uncle Emmett who is 95. The family wanted especially to be with him this year. He is Eddie's last living Uncle out of seven children on his mom's side. All that is left now of Eddie's family is our generation and younger.

God's Amazing Faithfulness

Isn't it amazing our Awesome God? We simple minded humans wake up, our thoughts and minds in a turmoil racing from one dread thought to another. We say a short faithless prayer and jump out of bed to begin the day. Then the phone rings and our world sinks deeper into despair, worry, pain as discouragement become our closest partner.

"to obey is better than sacrifice." I Samuel 15:22b So the prayer that never fails passes through our heart to God and His word is opened in anticipation that answers and comfort will be found. In the beginning was God..........he created man from the dust of the earth and took a rib from man and created woman and placed them in a perfect world and gave them all the perfect things they needed to live a perfect life. They hear with their ears, see with their eyes and a decision is made to take what appears to be something perhaps to make things even better. And their perfect family become dysfunctional through that dreaded thing called sin.

A family is made up of a father, a mother, and children. Each have responsibilities and lessons to be taught through interaction within that family. Each are required to do their part and be kind and thankful to each other as in Philippians 2:4,5 Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others.

Let nothing be done through strife or vain glory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves. When this begins to decrease in our homes then comes division and strife. However, our God remains the same. His love never fails.

Now he has our attention and our prayer becomes sincere and maybe even desperate. "Please Lord give me your word, give me something to hold on to." And as we open the devotional book for today's devotion on September 22, 2010 and after wards look down on the computer to see that today is September 23rd we are for the second time in less than one hour, humbled and sit amazed at the faithfulness of our God, our Savior, our redeemer, and our strength.

As we open a simple devotional, The title immediately sends tears to the eyes.

TRUST ME AND REFUSE TO WORRY, for I am your Strength and Song. You are feeling wobbly this morning, looking at difficult times looming ahead, measuring them against your own strength. However, they are not today's tasks--or even tomorrow's. So leave them in the future and come home to the present, where you will find me waiting for you. Since I am your Strength, I can empower you to handle each task as it comes. Because I am your Song, I can give you Joy as you work alongside Me.

Keep bringing your mind back to the present moment. Among all My creatures, only humans can anticipate future events. This ability is a blessing, but it can become a curse whenever it is misused. If you use your magnificent mind to worry about tomorrow, you cloak yourself in dark unbelief. However, when the hope of heaven fills your thoughts, the Light of My Presence envelops you. Though heaven is future, it is also present tense. As you walk in the Light with Me, you have one foot on earth and one foot in heaven. Exodus 15:2 2 Corinthians 10:5 Hebrews 10:23....."Jesus Calling", by Sarah Young

We bow our heads and pray once again. Thank you Lord for your faithfulness to one who has such little faith. Thank you for amazing us once again with your grace and mercy. Thank you Lord for looking into our hearts and seeing our needs as well as our desires. And most of all Lord thank you for preparing us with your words in our hearts, Holy Spirit inside that guides us to follow your commands and then to reap the rewards from that simple prayer that never fails. "Thy Will Be Done!"

In Memory of Ronald L. Nickens March 1, 1924- September 15, 2010

Last night our fire alarm went off and we could find no reason so we replaced the battery and returned to bed. Around 2:30 am.

Eddie came in after driving Alex to school this morning and said Ron set off the alarm as he passed by on his way to meet the Lord.

In 1982 Ron came into our lives while Eddie was employed by Texas Utilities Mining Company, and was instrumental in teaching Eddie the art of Non-Destructive testing. Eddie would take him around to test on the draglines and while he worked Eddie observed. He was very interested in the job and Ron felt he would be good at it and therefore began the beginning of a new career as well as a great friendship.

This career change has benefited us greatly financially as well as given Eddie the opportunity to travel to places he would never otherwise have gone, such as Turkey, Casa Blanca, and Africa.
Alex and I have traveled over much of the United States with him on his jobs.

Ron was a tall, gentle spoken man. It always amazed me that he kept everything clean after swimming in the same grease that my husband brought back in his suit case. He always spent a good deal of time cleaning his instrument before he put it in his bag and also made certain he had nothing on himself. He was a perfectionist this way. He had invented many things concerning his trade and he shared many of these with Eddie and they shared the different techniques that Eddie invented himself. In the beginning they were pretty constant companions on the jobs.

I remember we were in West Virginia and they were on that particular job together and we had supper with him. This became something we did each time they would be together at one place.

For years his wife traveled with him just as I did with Eddie, but in the last years she remained home and he traveled alone, therefore we were company for him at meal times. I met Delores Nickens at the airport in Longview for the first time while waiting on the Eddie to arrive. She was waiting for Ron also. This gave us opportunity to visit from time to time. We went to their home once and visited as Eddie helped Ron with some project on their lake property. From that point we began exchanging Christmas cards as well as gifts sometimes.

She smoked but Ron did not. He was diagnosed with diabetes several years after I was and therefore after our meals together we would take a brisk walk. I think sometimes Eddie would have sooner stayed seated having climbed the 200 foot boom that day, but he always walked.

Her health began to suffer and she has to have an oxygen bottle with her now everywhere she goes. I do believe she has quit smoking now.

We saw both of them at the I Hop in August and Ron being the gentleman he always was gave me a hug and told me I looked prettier now than the first time he saw me. He didn't stand as tall as before but that beautiful face still didn't have a wrinkle in it and his burr haircut was the same. His blue eyes held a sadness that just did not reach the smile he tried to give. It broke my heart but we were both so very glad to have bumped into them. Delores said he did not want visitors in the hospital which kept us away and Eddie sent me to get flowers at the hospital and have them sent to his room.

I will always feel the Lord let us have that last time together short as it was. It was no coincidence that I had left first to go the the restroom and then could not find Eddie because he had passed their table and sat down to speak with them. Had I not came back in looking for him, I would not have seen them standing in line and had the opportunity to actually say my goodbyes forever to Ron and possibly Delores also.

I just spoke with Delores and she told me of a story about Eddie and Ron which started the first time they met. Eddie told Ron he didn't believe in the testing but he would watch and see. So Ron asked him if he had to prove everything he believed, which was truly hysterical in on sense. It is positive proof he does because of his great faith in Jesus Christ. We do not know for certain if Ron knew the Lord personally or not. Delores said he was ready to go and if he was ready she was. Eddie had never point blank asked him if he was saved or not. And in these latter times never had the opportunity. We pray he was.

Eddie and I both feel very blessed to have known and loved this man and will always be grateful that he passed our way.

He worked until he was diagnosed with lung cancer, well into his 80"s.

He will be missed.

The Little Stream

Life is like a small stream of water as in a creek. The water flows at a trickle during the summer and as it passes in and around the curves in the bank it slowly passes a grazing cow. The sound of the grass being consistently snatched from the ground fades and the stream slides gently over the rocks and continues on its way. The scenery seldom remains the same. A gentle wind blows across the stream and causes ripples to crawl to the other side.

It continues on as if happy to have some relief from the heat and spills into a pool where it may remain quiet for a little while. A calmness comes over the stream as it swirls slowly around the bank watching all the activity and a stillness passes over the stream and it says to itself I am home at last.

Darkness comes as the clouds gather and slowly tiny drops of rain begin to fall. The trickle grows and slowly the stream finds its way past the pool as the rain begins to pound fiercely upon the little stream. Somewhere up stream comes a mighty rush of water that comes and pushes the little stream quickly on its way. The rocks no longer seem friendly, but stand as the water crashed against them and finds its way around to pass on its way. The beauty on the side of the banks are hidden by the wall of rain. The darkness seems to loom across the distance and the stream looks to the sky and asks why?

Today August 15, 2010 our pastor retired and resigned his position as pastor. My heart is broken. With this pastor their was a connection spiritually. He has a way of speaking that I relate to and understand. He is humble and honest and will tell you what you what he feels not what he is suppose to say or what one wants to hear. He just tells it as he believes it. I love that honesty. I love his forthright way of doing things. He remained detached yet I did not feel rejected. He knows how to say I don't know. I have never seen anything false in him. His love for his wife surpasses any I have witnessed. His love for his sister and his brother were such a witness in itself. My prayer is God let me pray earnestly thy will be done and not my will be done.

I must trust that this man I have come to admire and respect would surely know the leadership of the Holy Spirit and have made the decision God would have had him make. And also God will provide a pastor for us and one that will continue to preach out of the King James Version of the bible. As Eddie says King James has been the standard for over 400 years and when we leave the standard confusion takes place and God is not the author of confusion. To study with different translations is wonderful in its own right but it causes confusion when different translations are used in our Church services. All should be able to come with one translation, sit down, read the word in unison and there will be no confusion. All these years God has presented his word through his pastors and evangelists using the King James and He has blessed that translation. So we would not be able to stay under a pastor that did not share this belief.

Truly I look to the sky and my question is Lord Why?

Revelation or maybe Thought for Today

Why does it always amaze me when Jesus reveals himself to me and why is the enemy always waiting in the wings to discourage me?

Last night I was having doubts and fears come before my face like flickers of flames flashing in the fire place. It always appears worse during the darkness and joy always comes in the morning. I began to pray in face of my fears and my restlessness continued and ended with me giving up on sleep at 2 AM and I got up and got on the computer. Here is a red flag! I ultimately gave up on God in some sense and went to read emails. My accuser tells me this.

How many times have emails from friends spoken to my heart? How many times has God used them to speak to my heart in my troublesome times? My new computer would not let me see the WhereGodWantsMe.pps file that my friend sent to me, because I have not yet installed my programs like Microsoft Word. However, I was able to view one photo and as usual she had sent me a word from the Lord. Again frustration and the enemy scored a point. I just came to my old computer and saw the sight. It was indeed a reminder of Who is control. God always has an answer if we are just willing to listen.

This morning as I began my bible study and my faithful Lord began to work a work in me and I do believe it was because I was obedient to study his word. He rewards obedience. It isn't that I was great or I did anything, it was simply because I chose to seek his will.

First of all the study took me to the 38th chapter of Job. Ah! Lord God you have spoken of who you are, how AWESOME you are, how faithful and good and powerful you are. And for me and my fear; you have once again shown me who I am.

The question: Can you see ways the accuser has tried to discredit your testimony? If so, would you be willing to share one?

If Satan can bind me with fear then I cannot please God because it is impossible to please him without faith. If he can convince me I have no faith then he has successfully covered any light that might shine from my life, or successfully killed my testimony would be another way to say it.

My prayer....Lord, let me see my faith in you, reveal to me in my weakness you are made strong. Strengthen my resolve to love you, trust you, obey you and put you always first in my life.

Here was the perfect moment with my Lord. My confidence restored, my endeavor to get up serve him and praise his name prepared to begin and wham! He uses my best friend, my confidant, my other half of my body to discourage me. He who is 99% of the time my encouragement to temporarily crush the victory just given to me. In such a devious way as to have him ask for my opinion knowing full well that I would discourage his impatience in a matter and then turn it as my attitude was bad because I did not agree with his opinion. How better could Satan take my eyes off the Lord? How often does he use me in this same way?

We do not see with our eyes the true battle that is ever before us just beyond that Vail that closes the view from our world to the spiritual world, but I assure you that if you pay close attention you can see it's results working around us.

Greater is he that is in us than he that is in the world. He is the Victor. Let us keep our resolve to remain faithful to him as he has to us.

Marcel

Left to right John, his daughter, MARCEL, and John's other daughter.



There is a man not more than 5'7" tall, thin and the heart of a lion. He came into our lives because we believe God sent him.

In 1974, having recently lost my grandmother, I was going through some of my memorabilia and looked inside my father's old trunk. There was a little packet of letters tied together neatly with a purple and white ribbon. After opening several of the letters, it became apparent that these came to my father soon after he arrived back in the states, having been sent home wounded in battle at the Battle of the Bulge. The letters were post marked 1945 from Marcel Drugmand, Belgium.

My husband suggested I write to the address written on the letter and see if the man still lived there. I began the letter, "this is sent to you with a prayer that you might be the one to receive it." Several months passed and the mail came one day with a letter post marked Belgium. The letter began with the fact he had moved many years before down the street and the people living in his old home brought the letter to him. Later Marcel explained he had only one year of English and that he was deciphering my letter by a dictionary.

He and his wife Nelly had her father living with them. They never had children of their own. He told us about their friends, their lives and sent many photo's. The letters continued to come regularly and since Nelly knew no English, she would tell him things to write and Eddie would do the same, only from time to time Eddie added a few sentences to my letters and Nelly would do as well.

Nelly began to send our children little gifts at Easter, birthdays and other occasions and we in turn would send them presents at Christmas and birthdays. She always seem to choose such delightful gifts and we always looked forward to getting them. One Easter she sent them these huge eggs made of pressed cardboard and painted so beautifully on the outside and inside were candies. Then one Christmas I dared to make a dress for her. It was such a surprise to see that it actually fit her. She seemed so pleased. They were both so kind and our letters brought us together as a family. We seemed to fill the void of their having no children of their own. Marcel would call me his daughter. Our children became their grandchildren.

Marcel shared everything about their lives, their friends, their beliefs leaving nothing to imagine.
He sent many photos of his closest friends, which in the above photo is John, a boy hood friend. In his letters Marcel's friends became our friends. He made it so easy to know each of them through his loving eyes.

Then tragedy struck when Nelly's father went up into the attic and hung himself. they shared their grief and pain with us. Life was very difficult for them during this period of time.

In 1981 he wrote that Nelly had cancer. We watched through photos and listened through letters as she struggled with her illness and eventually the letter came in 1985 that she had passed away.

Marcel was naturally grief stricken, but he remained faithful to write.

We had quite a shock when the letter came and Marcel asked if he could come visit us. It would be difficult to express the emotions that went through our minds. Our largest concern was communication. We had never even thought of learning the French language. Our days filled with anticipation and preparation for his arrival.

He arrived at DFW airport. He had described what he would be wearing and of course we had the photos to actually know what he looked like. As always when your anticipating a passenger to deplane, he was one of the last out the door. I don't know which of us was more nervous he or us. He slowly walked out into our area and as he recognized us came and grabbed each of us in turn and kissed us on both cheeks.

We found our car and he climbed in the back seat chattering a hundred words a minute. It was amazing that we could understand him so well.

We had just sat down and as Eddie backed out of the parking space Marcel reached for my arm and said I have a gift for you. He clasped a large golden bracelet on my arm with shaking hands, that later we learned was real 18 carat gold. It sits in the safety deposit box even to this day. It was one he had bought for Nelly and he felt she would want their daughter to have it. We were shocked. The most expensive piece of jewelry I ever owned was the $100.00 pair of wedding rings that my husband had did without meals to purchase for me while he was in college.

We arrived home, all were exhausted emotionally and physically. We showed Marcel to his room but sleep was difficult for him because of the time difference.

Eddie worked 12 hour shifts, seven days on and seven days off. Therefore this left Marcel with Carol and I while he was working.

Marcel asked to see the Grand Canyon and he wanted to purchase the plane tickets for all of us to fly. This was a miracle in itself, because our finances did not cover plane tickets. Eddie had a few frequent flier miles from business trips, but not enough for a paid ticket at this time.

And then there was the issue of Carol and I had never flown before. Why I was scared out of my ever living mind. However, fly we did and life took on an entirely different turn.

Carol and Marcel took a small plane and flew through the canyon. Marcel was lifted to heights few ever reach and Carol was thrown to depths she never knew existed. Where was the bag as she rolled to the floor? She spent her time prostrate on a bed with her head and eyes covered with a wet wash cloth while Eddie, Marcel and I inhaled the beauty and splendor of the sight of the canyon. It was absolutely wonderful to watch him as he drank it all in.

He stayed with us for three months. We had a garden which had never before nor after looked the same as while he was with us. Each morning he was up at dawn and weeding the garden. A blade of grass nor weed dared not show their heads. Then he went to the flower beds and decided we needed some landscaping around the front and he built a border of bricks across the front of the yard edging the driveway.

Eddie taught him to drive our stick shift pickup. I stood and watched in horror as he loped toward the gate fearing the worst, however he jumped on through it and Eddie sat there cool as a cucumber with his arm out the window.

Next it was letting him drive the bulldozer. Oh good grief! I watched and imagined the entire barn being removed along with the door, but once again by the hair of his chinney chin chin he made it in and out like a pro (well maybe a drunk pro), but he made it. I do not recall ever having a dull moment.

Ramona and I took Marcel to Hodges Gardens in Louisiana and spent the day. I think had we known about the beautiful gardens in Europe we would never have thought to bother taking him there. However, as always he seemed excited and so very grateful to go.

His home has a sidewalk between the house and the street. His back yard is as wide as his house and maybe 8' deep. They have no yards to speak of. And to be able to be outside in the sunshine and to work a garden was a blessing and privilege to him. Belgium gets very little sunshine, but a lot of rain and clouds.

We took a road trip to Santa Fe, New Mexico and I wonder his head did not ache from turning side to side at the vast view of open land. This was a rare sight in Belgium. He bought books and got brochures every where we went and we took rolls of film to be developed. Marcel had a very nice camera with a zoom lens which he loved and used very well.

He loved White Sands, New Mexico and climbed the dunes while all of us played like children. It was wonderful to be able to see things through his eyes. We ate at a place called "Papa Johns". This was a source of conversation for days following the experience. I do not believe this was one of the chains we have today.

Once we went to Ft. Worth and ate at an Italian restaurant and he insisted we have the cherries jubilee. It may be known as Cherry Flambe. A waiter brought a cart to our table and made it right there for us. It began with butter and then they added strawberries or cherries and poured some sort of liquor over it and set it on fire which burned out the alcohol and poured the mixture over ice cream served on a decorated plate for each of us. It was like a dream. A fairy tale. Here we were just ordinary people that for us a vacation was going camping at the lake for two weeks each summer and eating out was a luxury at Wyatt's cafeteria, yet here we sat served dessert by a personal waiter. Oh wow!

We took him to the Kimbell Art Museum in Ft. Worth and he enjoyed it very much. Then we went to see a few of our closest friends living in the area and introduced Marcel. Eddie's parents also had him in their home for a visit.

We have a photo of Marcel sitting on our horse, Julie with a sleeveless undershirt, shorts and sandels. Oh what a sight he was. This was his idea of fighting our heat while at home. He was such a good sport. I do not recall his complaining with the heat nor humidity for which he certainly was not accustomed.

As we introduced Marcel to America, he in turn introduced us to Europe through Channel #5, Tabac cologne, Seiko watches and different kinds of food.

Marcel told us stories of the war in his youth. I recall one particular story of when he worked in a mine and all the food he had was a slice of bread strapped to his ankle soaked in perspiration that was his meal for the day. He told of his weight which was less than 100 pounds. They fought starvation daily. Later he told of how the Americans saved his country.

We never missed a church service when we were home and Marcel became acquainted with several in our church. He was raised Catholic and several times mentioned he was baptized as an infant and this disturbed him. He listened carefully at every service. Then one Sunday morning Marcel walked the isle and reaffirmed he was saved and had asked Christ into his heart and believed he had saved his soul. He wanted to be baptized and baptized he was. He kissed every person that came to shake his hand that morning. There was a lot of kissing going on and a lot of people certainly left their comfort zones. Being kissed on both cheeks every morning can become a real issue. Thankfully we endured leaving our comfort zones. Everyone that met Marcel loved him instantly.

Another one of our friends Nell Farmer came from San Antonio with her husband James on a job and after her visit asked if we would come let them show Marcel San Antonio. Carol, her friend Cody and I took him for the visit. We had our first meal of fajitas. None of us had ever eaten them before. On the table they put a small bowl of carrots, peppers and onions. Marcel took one of the carrots popped it into his mouth and began to chew. His face turned red and his head shrunk down into his shoulders as he grabbed the glass of water. As he regained his composure his reply was, "this was very good." I believe all were dying with laughter inside but all afraid to laugh out loud, but then he guffawed and we all laughed. Nell and James were such good hosts. Marcel had noticed the Texas Monthly magazine laying on the coffee table in their home and liked it very much. They later sent him a subscription which was another highlight for him.

On the way home darkness came bringing heavy rain with it. We drove and as the rain let up we heard Marcel in his French speaking way keep repeating, "splat". It sounded so amusing and finally I asked what was he saying. He pointed to the windshield at a bug that had hit and of course splat! There was always something new, amusing, heart warming or a learning experience in the presence of Marcel.

We took a trip to the mall one evening and we didn't park in the area I was accustom to park. When we came out the entrance I could not find the car. I began to panic after we had walked for several minutes searching. I was about to call home and tell Eddie someone had stolen the car when we walked around to the other side of the mall and I realized I had come out the door where I would always come and not the door we went in. Finally we spotted the car. By this time I was so nervous I was shaking. Here I had this poor man out in the heat, lost. We got in the car and I put it in gear and tore across the parking lot, when all of a sudden a median was in front of me and I slid right up to the dumb thing and stopped within an inch of hitting it. His reply, "GOOD REACTION!" I will always remember that. The man had nerves of steel.

Another friend, Sally Nelson went with me and we took Marcel to see New Orleans. This was another place he wished to see. I am not a world traveler if that is not obvious already and we did not take in to account this was near Easter. They had the main streets down town roped off and we could not find a place to park and walk to view the town. After driving for seemingly hours following a wagon pulled by a mule, we passed Bourbon street. I believe he was impressed by the tall bridges we crossed over in New Orleans, while he listened quietly as I prayed out loud while gripping the steering wheel. We drove on to Buloxi, Mississippi and watched the ocean while he told us of the North Sea and the freezing cold water which the people would brave to go swimming each year. We also returned by way of the Natches Trace. This was a complete success and relaxing to all of us.

Our oldest daughter Robin graduated from the University of Tyler and planned to marry in August. Marcel promised to return for her wedding, which he did. This time he did not come alone, but brought a friend. Roxane was about 13 and the daughter of a close friend that kept his house for him. Marcel has a way of making everyone close to him as family.

Roxane rode horses with Robin, Carol and Suzie. She and the girls shared many hours together and Roxane really liked Suzie. Naturally the language barrier was difficult, but they seemed to get along well in spite of it.

Marcel's six month stay took us on many travels and experiences which will be lasting memories with photos to remind us. I believe we helped him through his grief as he brought unspeakable joy into our lives which were forever changed.

Before he left he made plans for us to come visit him in Belgium, but that is another story which I hope to write about soon.

Where are all the great "Thinkers" in our time?

I am definitely not a history buff, however I do recall the philosophers and as I remember it, the great thinkers in the olden days. Today it would seem nobody has time to sit and think. We are too busy on the move or letting all the distractions that come our way rob us of the wonderful time to sit and ponder on important things as well as just little silly things.

Let me begin these thoughts with the fact I am guilty of all.

This morning the thought came across so loudly to me as while studying and in my prayer time also. Why do we put so much energy and focus on the dying of a Saint, which is simply dropping their body suits as they pass through the next door.

We ask prayer, and we should; we spend many hours at times worrying or trying to think of ways to minister to this soul. Yet one comes and asks Jesus as their Savior, whereby they can enter that same door that saint will soon enter, and we say thank you Lord, go about our business and many times never pray for that person.

At funerals we have what now is termed as celebrations, many kind words, and a feast is thrown for the family and that is as it should be, but what happened to the feast and celebration of a newborn christian? We barely have follow up classes to help mature new Christians.

Another thing that seems to be neglected would be an alter call for those facing perilous times with their health or with some burden in their families. Most people probably reach back to their personal experiences to grasp the way things are performed today or ways to perform their actions. In my personal experience, I recall when a woman was so very sick with cancer and her future looked bleak. Everyone gathered around the alter and prayed for her. I don't recall that she was there at the time, but I do recall that we all prayed fervently. And the Lord heard the prayer of a righteous man praying an effectual fervent prayer. (James 5:16). Verse 15 states And the prayer of faith shall save the sick, and the Lord shall raise him up, and if he hath committed sins, they shall be forgiven him. It isn't the power of the one praying, but the power of the one listening that raises up the sick. All we are required to do in this life is fear God and keep his commandments. Ecclesiastes 12:13. That is the whole duty of man.

At this present time we have a precious man in our church that has cancer all over his body and man will say that he will most assuredly die. My focus is stayed on this man and his family. I don't believe any of us want to see him taken home right now. My nature is to try and do something to make it easier for this man and his family. Will words help? Can we carry food over to them and will this help? If we send cards to let them know we are praying for them will that help?

God has our hairs numbered, he created the stars and the galaxies and they are as vast as the grains of the sands on our beaches. It will be his decision to the life span of this man and not what man thinks. He alone has the power to raise up or take home our loved ones. Praise you Lord!

Each of us are made up differently by our creator. And until the time comes none of us truly know what would make a difference to us. I believe it would mean the world to me to have my church family gather around me, lay their tender hands of love on my shoulders and kneel and pray for me. And I would hope every time my name came to their mind there would be a prayer on their lips following. This would be my comfort.

Psalm 116:15 Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of his saints. This is written on our daughter's tombstone. Even at that time there was such comfort in those words. As I finished this thought the next thought that came to my mind was, "even so, come quickly, Lord Jesus." The author and finisher of our faith is Jesus Christ and our hope is only in him. I don't want to die and I don't want my loved ones or the ones outside my immediate family to die, but I do know my redeemer lives. It may seem very selfish to want the Lord's return to avoid death beds coming, but in my flesh it is there and I cannot deny it.

That desire is also there when news comes that men in China have gone in and chopped to death little children with hatchets. People are covered alive in rubble. Men are lost forever out to sea to never be found in an oil derrick explosion. The oceans are polluted by oil because of man's greed, possibly, to not spend money for safe guards that are there for the buying. Children are being molested, beaten, starved, mentally abused. Families are broken apart and heartache replaces joy and laughter in our homes.

Death is seemingly so small a thing to want the Lord to come back and let us avoid, but how about another soul marching down the road to be delivered into a devil's hell because they did not see Jesus in us? Mercy we cry, grace we pray for, deliverance is our desire.

When I went forward for salvation, I recall our precious youth director and his wife were with me later and they were so happy and concerned for me. As I attended classes on Sunday nights I feel that Bill Jefferey had lesson plans that were to encourage and teach a new convert. He was my hero and he ministered to my spirit. I will never forget he and his wife, how they stood by me, celebrated with me and lived their lives before me to teach me the way of the Lord.

At this present time from all accounts I believe our youth director will also perform this same action for he is burdened for the lost kids that come to class.

Oh! how thankful we are dear Lord to have your Holy Spirit come upon those leading our children and help us to hold him up in prayer as well as those who come into his center of influence.

Children are so very precious and the older I get the more I watch them and see the innocence and the beauty and joy they bring to all of us. As we sit in a school setting, or a church setting, it comes over me like a wave of warm water and I understand why Jesus said, ye must come to me as a little child. I don't know how emotions affect others, but for me every time we have had the ending to a bible school with their little programs and every time the little ones get up to sing praises to the Lord, emotions roll over me afresh and my heart just seems to beat faster and a warmth I cannot describe envelopes my soul, a joy fills my entire being and most of the time I begin to cry. They are so precious. If this is what I feel just watching them; it is unimaginable to me how the Savior feels when they come home to him.

Oh! if only we could do in the flesh as in the spirit, as the bible teaches and cry when they are born and rejoice when they go home to the Lord.

Perilous Times

<sup>I was going to close my thoughts on this verse, but it may be the most important thing said of all I have to say; therefore I will begin with this thought, which is the ultimate answer to my question, "what am I suppose to do for preparation in these perilous times?"

14</sup> If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land. 2 Chronicles 7:14

Does anyone really believe that our lives are going to change forever in the near future? Or do we find we are staying so busy with our lives that we refuse to look and see what is right before our eyes? The television news is screaming in our ears, the newspapers are right before our eyes in black and white and yet we have ears that do not hear and eyes that do not see.

Mark 4:9 And he said unto them, He that hath ears to hear, let him hear.

¹⁸ Having eyes, see ye not? and having ears, hear ye not? and do ye not remember?

Mk 8:18

We know the scriptures if we have searched for the heart of God and surrendered our lives to him, yet even when we know the scriptures do we remember?

I wrote about my beautiful view out the front window of our home and for me this has began to be a sort of sanctuary. A place when I stop and look out and see nothing but God's creation that reflection quickly comes to mind. I know perilous times are coming because the Lord said they would and the Lord cannot lie. He has said in his word their would be many anti-Christs that would arise on the earth. Those of us that have lived for over half a century have witnessed this. Jim Jones in the Guyana incident, David Koresh and the burning in Waco of his temple. The most massive, of course was Adolf Hitler. Now another leader has came to our country and many fear that he is another anti-Christ. Some even believe he may be the real anti-Christ. He has wielded power that in my life time has never been the achieved. People evidentially wanted change and thought his promises would bring it about.

I am reminded of Moses and the Israelite s, they wanted change. God looked down and in his love for his people delivered them out of bondage and led them to the promised land with a pillar of fire by night and a cloud by day and performed miracles never seen before. Yet many died in unbelief right at the time in their lives these events were being performed before their very eyes. We sit back and say to ourselves how could they be so very blind? Yet we have all the signs that God put in his word to warn us of his immediate coming and what are we doing?

In my heart it is like coming in at night and switching on the light and immediately I see how to maneuver through the house. An awareness comes when I hear of the floods, earthquakes, and volcano's erupting throwing ash in the air and stifling economy. However, as my eyes adjust to the light I quickly go about my way forgetting the darkness that I have just left.

I have watched and the decline of moral values since 1976 or 1977 when the women's lib movement began and it was predicted we would see abortion, same sex marriage and euthanasia. We worked diligently with those that saw the dangers this movement would bring about and sought to educate and warn young women of the results, but Satan won the battle, and the bill passed.

Today we see babies lives taken away before they have the chance to be born and make a difference in this world. If we live long enough, we will be slowly killed because we are old and the young are told we should not live because we are weak and sick and a drain on the economy.

Have you ever wondered how many of those baby boys might have been great preachers of God's word and reached thousands with the message of salvation and God's love? How many of those baby girls might have loved and nurtured their children and taught Sunday school classes to those that didn't have time for Jesus and those little lives be turned toward Christ?

For the more fleshly point of view; how many of those killed before their birth might have grown and found the cure for cancer, diabetes, arthritis and the other diseases that not only drain our economy, but prematurely take the lives or the quality of live from our people.

Yet sin prevails and we seem to welcome it with open arms. The God that created us, gave us the free choice of will and gave us the escape of retribution for our sin and replaced it with the hope of eternal life is being extinguished daily through the media and our leaders that only seek to line their pockets and as said in the beginning have eyes that do not see and ears that do not hear. Even more sad, apathy has overtaken the very people that he has delivered from eternal death and separation from himself.

We have lived in a time when we saw great Revivals, people come and kneel at the alter and pray for forgiveness for their sins and go back home and teach their children about the Jesus that delivered them from an eternity of doom. We have watched the Holy Spirit move in lives that seemed hopeless. We have watched prayers be answered and saw the faithfulness, love, mercy and grace of Jesus Christ in our own personal lives. Now we watch as it has slowly, like a candle that has burned down to the stub, flicker and seems like it will finally go out.

Personally I have lived in a time where we played at night on the end of the street close to our house in the light of only a street light and had no fear. Doors were not locked and cars, lawn mowers, etc. could safely sit in the back yard. Our teachers were respected and when they spoke to our parents we knew we were in for it because they sought our best interests and our parents cooperated with them for the good of the children. We had a mother and daddy with one name for all of our lives. Our mothers were home when we woke up and gave us breakfast, made sure we washed, brushed our teeth and had clean clothes to wear. Daddy went to work and earned our living and mama stayed home and earned her children's lives. Of course there were always exceptions, as in my very own life where a father in weakness of his flesh sought many women and my mother was left to make a life for me and herself. However, divorce was the exception not the norm. Sin was still in the world, but people knew what sin was and the difference between the truth and a lie. Things were black and white not gray. We knew where we stood whether it be on the side of right or the side of wrong. Today that is not true.

Oh! are we not glad that this is not the end of the story? This is what Satan had to say!

¹³ For thou hast said in thine heart, I will ascend into heaven, I will exalt my throne above the stars of God: I will sit also upon the mount of the congregation, in the sides of the north: ¹⁴ I will ascend above the heights of the clouds; I will be like the most High. Isaiah 14:13-14

However, this is what God has to say about the matter.

¹ I will love thee, O LORD, my strength. ² The LORD is my rock, and my fortress, and my deliverer; my God, my strength, in whom I will trust; my buckler, and the horn of my salvation, and my high tower. Psalm 18:1-2

² I will cry unto God most high; unto God that performeth all things for me. ³ He shall send from heaven, and save me from the reproach of him that would swallow me up. Selah. God shall send forth his mercy and his truth. ⁴ My soul is among lions: and I lie even among them that are set on fire, even the sons of men, whose teeth are spears and arrows, and their tongue a sharp sword. ⁵ Be thou exalted, O God, above the heavens; let thy glory be above all the earth. ⁶ They have prepared a net for my steps; my soul is bowed down: they have digged a pit before me, into the midst whereof they are fallen themselves. Selah.

⁷ O God, my heart is fixed: I will sing and give praise. ⁸ Awake up, my glory; awake, psaltery and harp: I myself will awake early. ⁹ I will praise thee, O Lord, among the people: I will sing unto thee among the nations. ¹⁰ For thy mercy is great unto the heavens, and thy truth unto the clouds. ¹¹ Be thou exalted, O God, above the heavens: let thy glory be above all the earth. Psalm 57:1-11

And this is what we must do, and this is the answer to my question, "Lord how do I prepare for these events that will come as surely as you let the air fill my lungs and my lungs release that my life is sustained.

¹ And David spake unto the LORD the words of this song in the day that the LORD had delivered him out of the hand of all his enemies, and out of the hand of Saul:

² And he said, The LORD is my rock, and my fortress, and my deliverer; ³ The God of my rock; in him will I trust: he is my shield, and the horn of my salvation, my high tower, and my refuge, my saviour; thou savest me from violence. ⁴ I will call on the LORD, who is worthy to be praised: so shall I be saved from mine enemies. ⁵ When the waves^a of death compassed me, the floods of ungodly men made me afraid; ⁶ The sorrows^b of hell compassed me about; the snares of death prevented me; ⁷ In my distress I called upon the LORD, and cried to my God: and he did hear my voice out of his temple, and my cry did enter into his ears. ⁸ Then the earth shook and trembled; the foundations of heaven moved and shook, because he was wroth. ⁹ There went up a smoke out of his nostrils^c, and fire out of his mouth devoured: coals were kindled by it. ¹⁰ He bowed the heavens also, and came down; and darkness was under his feet. ¹¹ And he rode upon a cherub, and did fly: and he was seen upon the wings of the wind. ¹² And he made darkness pavilions round about him, dark^d waters, and thick clouds of the skies. ¹³ Through the brightness before him were coals of fire kindled. ¹⁴ The LORD thundered from heaven, and the most High uttered his voice. ¹⁵ And he sent out arrows, and scattered them; lightning, and discomfited them. ¹⁶ And the channels of the sea appeared, the foundations of the world were discovered, at the rebuking of the LORD, at the blast of the breath of his nostrils. ¹⁷ He sent from above, he took me; he drew me out of many^e waters; ¹⁸ He delivered me from my strong enemy, and from them that hated me: for they were too strong for me. ¹⁹ They prevented me in the day of my calamity: but the LORD was my stay. ²⁰ He brought me forth also into a large place: he delivered me, because he delighted in me. ²¹ The LORD rewarded me according to my righteousness: according to the cleanness of my hands hath he recompensed me. ²² For I have kept the ways of the LORD, and have not wickedly departed from my God. ²³ For all his judgments were before me: and as for his statutes, I did not depart from them. ²⁴ I was also upright before him, and have kept myself from mine iniquity. ²⁵ Therefore the LORD hath recompensed me according to my righteousness; according to my cleanness in his eye sight. ²⁶ With the merciful thou wilt shew thyself merciful, and with the upright man thou wilt shew thyself upright. ²⁷ With the pure thou wilt shew thyself pure; and with the froward thou wilt shew thyself unsavoury^f. ²⁸ And the afflicted people thou wilt save: but thine eyes are upon the haughty, that thou mayest bring them down. ²⁹ For thou art my lamp^g, O LORD: and the LORD will lighten my darkness. ³⁰ For by thee I have run^h through a troop: by my God have I leaped over a wall. ³¹ As for God, his way is perfect; the word of the LORD is triedⁱ: he is a buckler to all them that trust in him. ³² For who is God, save the LORD? and who is a rock, save our God? ³³ God is my strength and power: and he maketh^j my way perfect. ³⁴ He maketh^k my feet like hinds’ feet: and setteth me upon my high places. ³⁵ He teacheth my hands to war^l; so that a bow of steel is broken by mine arms. ³⁶ Thou hast also given me the shield of thy salvation: and thy gentleness hath made me great. ³⁷ Thou hast enlarged my steps under me; so that my feet^m did not slip. ³⁸ I have pursued mine enemies, and destroyed them; and turned not again until I had consumed them. ³⁹ And I have consumed them, and wounded them, that they could not arise: yea, they are fallen under my feet. ⁴⁰ For thou hast girded me with strength to battle: them that rose up against me hast thou subduedⁿ under me. ⁴¹ Thou hast also given me the necks of mine enemies, that I might destroy them that hate me. ⁴² They looked, but there was none to save; even unto the LORD, but he answered them not. ⁴³ Then did I beat them as small as the dust of the earth, I did stamp them as the mire of the street, and did spread them abroad. ⁴⁴ Thou also hast delivered me from the strivings of my people, thou hast kept me to be head of the heathen: a people which I knew not shall serve me. ⁴⁵ Strangers^o shall submit themselves unto me: as soon as they hear, they shall be obedient unto me. ⁴⁶ Strangers shall fade away, and they shall be afraid out of their close places. ⁴⁷ The LORD liveth; and blessed be my rock; and exalted be the God of the rock of my salvation. ⁴⁸ It is God that avengeth^p me, and that bringeth down the people under me, ⁴⁹ And that bringeth me forth from mine enemies: thou also hast lifted me up on high above them that rose up against me: thou hast delivered me from the violent man. ⁵⁰ Therefore I will give thanks unto thee, O LORD, among the heathen, and I will sing praises unto thy name. ⁵¹ He is the tower of salvation for his king: and sheweth mercy to his anointed, unto David, and to his seed for evermore. 2 Samuel 22:1-51

I will end with a footnote from my Alex, who has been so patient and let me have this time to share my thoughts and hopefully inspire someone to read God's words written here and let it be a healing to their souls and a peace to their hearts.

Alex wanted me to write down the memory verse she is to recite next Wednesday night in Church with her Team kids class mates.

With all my heart I try to obey you. don't let me break your commands. Psalm 119.10

A Tribute To A Friend

Joy Loretta Peck passed away Saturday, October 3, 2009, at a local hospice center with all of her children and two special friends present. She had battled cancer with great courage for four years and seven months.

Joy was born March 19, 1935, near Ringling, Oklahoma, to Willie Arthur and Virginia Baker. She was married to John Peck on March 23, 1953, in Henrietta and this union produced three sons, 12 grandchildren and six great-grandchildren.

Joy was always a homemaker, a wonderful mother, and a woman of great help to her husband. She had trusted Jesus as her Savior as a teenager, and greatly loved her church, Grace Baptist Church.

John wrote the Obituary and was greatly distressed when he realized he had not listed Joy's sisters names and it surprises me that the funeral home did not ask. However, she had three sisters. I do not remember her ever speaking of a brother. Audrey was her youngest sister who previously died also with cancer. Bertha Mae and the other sisters name (maybe Agnes) alludes me.

This immediately brings to mind the subject matter of the sermon her pastor preached the day of her funeral. Proverbs 31

¹⁰ Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies. ¹¹ The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. ¹² She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life. ¹³ She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands. ¹⁴ She is like the merchants’ ships; she bringeth her food from afar. ¹⁵ She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens. ¹⁶ She considereth a field, and buyeth^a it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard. ¹⁷ She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms. ¹⁸ She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night. ¹⁹ She layeth her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff. ²⁰ She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy. ²¹ She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet^b. ²² She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple. ²³ Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land. ²⁴ She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant. ²⁵ Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come. ²⁶ She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness. ²⁷ She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness. ²⁸ Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her. ²⁹ Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all. ³⁰ Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised. ³¹ Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.

Many times this passage has been preached about a woman at a funeral service, but that day the woman had already preached the sermon by living it.

Joy was laying in the bed in her room and it was evident she was in tremendous pain in her last days. Remembering this scene another one comes to the forefront of my mind. Her Savior is standing there beside the bed and gently he reaches down and pushes a stray hair from her brow, as he bends down close to her ear and whispers, "you my child were that virtuous woman I had written about in my word". "You my child have done well."

Joy was a quiet soft spoken woman. She listened much more than she would ever speak. She didn't talk about herself and she didn't speak harshly about others. She loved her husband and she served him well as a wife in all ways. "The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil."

²⁸ Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her. She loved her boys and prayed for them regularly. They were always the focus in her world. And they did call her blessed.

She worked outside the home after the children were grown as a house keeper for a few people. She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands. "¹⁴ She is like the merchants’ ships; she bringeth her food from afar."

I believe this part of Joy's life show's the true virtuous woman. After she would take her chemo treatment and get over the nausea she would go to this elderly couples home and clean their house for them. She did it because they needed her. She was a welcome sight to them for companionship as well as what she could physically do for them. She was really beginning to suffer the last months of her life, but she still went to their home right up till the last time she could take a chemo treatment. In my eyes this was dedication beyond description.

"She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms." She did even for those outside her family in the dwindling of all her strength.

She lived over two hundred miles away from us, but we talked on the telephone at least once a week that last year. Each time I called to ask how she was doing she would always, without fail tell me that she was doing pretty good and before the last word ended in my ears; she would quickly ask, "how are you?"

We never visited them that she didn't have a roast with potatoes, carrots and onions with a big salad waiting for us when we got there. "She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens" She was always quick to be hospitable. We never missed Church when they visited here or we visited there. They believed in the importance of faithful worship in the Lord's house.

She was always faithful also in having John's breakfast, lunch and dinner cooked and ready for him to eat. This was not a once in a while thing it was a daily thing with her. He was her Prince and she treated him with all the respect one would give a Prince. She never sat down and let someone else do the serving or cleaning up, but always sat down last after the table was spread and was the first to arise to clear it off. I never saw her home dirty or even in disarray. Even though she might tell me she had not cleaned that day. Not even in her last days at home did her home show neglect.

A niece came to stay with her and John that last few weeks to help in their home. I called to check on them and John said, "she is in the kitchen helping prepare dinner." "We can't keep her down to rest." She could barley get up out of her chair, but there she stood caring for her guest and her John.

John had told her to call him before she bathed because he feared she would fall and when he went in to check on her she was bathed and laying on the bed trying to regain her strength and so very nauseated and in pain. She wouldn't complain and the saddest thing was when she could no longer keep the moans quiet because her stomach hurt so badly. She had a beautiful refrain when asked the question that inevitably is asked, "I win either way." She was confident in her Savior and she knew she would be here with him or there with him.

Always it was her concern about John being left alone. She fought a good fight and the last year she felt that John had been prepared and he could cook and clean and be self sufficient without her. She wanted to give up so badly, but what about her boys and their families? Joy talked and prayed about those boys and their lives and her desire as most of us christian mothers, that she just wanted to see them all in Church serving the Lord. She grieved over the grandchildren that seemed to have lost their way for a time. She took them in, provided for them, prayed for them and served them with a heart of love. Although I was not there I feel she chose her words carefully when she did address them on any given subject. " She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness." Joy loved them all.

In the early years of our friendship, which began in the late '60's, Joy and John were part of a group of lifetime friends that would go to Church together, go fishing together on vacation, share New Years Eve, (in the real early years in Church preaching in the New Year). After they stopped having the New Years eve services, John, Joy, Jimmy, Betty, June and Leonard would all get together and welcome in the New Year playing domino's. I remember one year when our Pastor lived across the street from us. I don't recall if it was the kids or our men that set off firecrackers in the front yard at mid-night and woke up our pastor and his family, but I do know everyone involved seemed to really have a delight in doing it. He was a good sport and joined in the laughter also.

Another memory that came up during the visits to our house many times was about when Jimmy and Betty brought them to deliver some long pipe for a carport we were building. Eddie had given directions to our home (the first time they had visited that house) and Joy called from a CB (we didn't have cell phones back then), and said with a really frazzled voice, we are lost. Eddie asked where they were and she said we are in a grave yard. Jimmy has the trailer pushed against the fence and we can't get turned around. She had spoken to someone else on the CB and they told her she best get out of that grave yard. Needless to say this has provided years of laughter and pleasure for those who would remind Eddie of the event and he has never lived it down. Eddie went to rescue them and all ended well.

Another event happened when all of us were camped at Lake Whitney. The men had gone to do some night fishing and us women were left at camp alone. We had walked up the road from the camp to see if we could see their lights coming back and an animal rustled in the bushes somewhere close by and all I could hear were feet pounding the sand in retreat, leaving me standing there with a flash light in my hand. I am not certain Joy was there that time and it may have just been June and Betty, but I learned real quick that I was on my own. So many times we have laughed over that memory.

I do not know if the cancer had a name. It was described as small tumors sprinkled like salt all over the lining of her stomach. She had a hysterectomy, then colon surgery twice. Eventually it had eaten through her colon and was dumping into her stomach. The Lord was merciful to her and she was able to live with little discomfort most of the time for the first couple of years but the time would come when a surgery would have to happen and she suffered. Of course she suffered through the chemo with nausea. The last year was the worst.

However, she would travel to see John's family and her family in Oklahoma and they would come here. I know so many times she was so tired she could barely go, but always that smile would be there and she would persevere. The last time they came I took her in the mule and John and Eddie rode on the four wheelers back to the creek and through the woods. She wore a mask because she was so allergic to everything in East Texas. I know she seemed to enjoy it so much. She was suffering, but again she said very little.

Betty and Joy were the closest friends. Their friendship went back several years before I met any of them. John and Jimmy were almost inseparable as were Joy and Betty. I really became a part of their lives when Betty found out she had breast cancer. Betty is a cancer survivor. Joy was there always for her during this time especially. This was the time when Joy and I bonded. June was such a homebody but she also was there for Betty too. We then became the four musketeers. June and Leonard had gone to Church with them also and they were all good friends that were close enough that I recall Betty talking about how they would go to town on Friday nights and get groceries together. All of us came from very humble beginnings. As the years passed the Lord blessed all of us with material things, but nothing compares with the love for each other that he blessed us to share.

June was the first of our group to go to be with the Lord. She had a liver disease that took her away from us way before she left this world. She had high levels of some chemical that built up in her system and she would not really be with us totally until the levels went down through elimination caused by some medications she was able to take. As with Joy it was several years before she died with the disease. Again I do not think they had an actual name for it. She was not a candidate for liver transplant because of other complications. She never drank a drop of liquor in her life, but her life did end with sirocus of the liver.

I never saw Joy dressed in any immodest way in all the days I knew her and I did know how she felt about provocative dress. I never heard her use a curse word. I never knew of her breaking a confidence. "Strength and honour are her clothing;" I am taking this somewhat out of context but strenth and honour were shown in the clothing she wore. She loved to shop. She always looked cute and fashionable, yet she always served John well by being frugal with her spending. She was not wasteful. Proof came in the end about this. John said she told him where she had stashed money so that he could find it right before she died. He was shocked when he found $1500 here and $1000 there. Joy had always been worried her cancer would eat up all their finances and leave John destitute. Materially they lived very modestly. I don't remember them ever having a brand new car. They always bought a low mileage used one. Joy had her house decorated like Better Homes and Gardens, but it was buying from friends decorating parties and picking up things here and there.

Joy was a human and I am sure she made many mistakes and she would be the first to tell you that, but she lived the exclamatory life I see in the scripture and honestly she was one of few that the sermon could have been true in almost every point. I never realized until this very moment that I never criticized Joy for anything she ever did. I don't think her faults were evident to me and believe me, I can find them in anyone. She was my trusted friend and I believe anything I ever told her went to her grave with her.

We went to be with Joy for the last time and I watched as my husband took her hand and told her how very special she was and what her life had meant to him. A moment in time for me because I never experienced this sight before. This speaks volumes for her character because my husband is so very reserved and very few ever touch his life to the point he would gain courage to do such a thing as this. He admired and respected her very much.

I am such an open book and have no understanding of private people but have learned to respect their privacy. I wanted to ask her questions about what she was feeling, because I know my time will come to go to be with the Lord and I hoped she could tell me something that would help me when I reached that time. I don't recall the exact question I asked, but I do remember her answer. "Lillian, I just never talked very much." She shut her eyes and went to sleep once more. I never tried to ask anything anymore. Did I feel rejected or reprimanded? No, because I knew Joy and I knew she just didn't have the words to say to me at that moment.

Joy spent her time at the hospital visiting the sick and again she did this when she was not suppose to be around people because her white count was so low. She missed very few Church services because I believe she wanted to be there and she wanted others to know whose side she was on. She bowled in her bowling league and was faithful to be there when others would have been home in bed with their suffering. She never gave up her fight to live. I truly believe if it had been to live for herself she would have given up after the first surgery.

Anyone is blessed to have one friend, but Eddie and I had six that kept us close even after we moved two hundred miles away. And that was a thirty four year long distance relationship. We were indeed blessed and still are with the four that are left.