Today a New Beginning of an old Life

Oh! The difference in the conviction of the Holy Spirit rather than the conviction of one’s conscience; it is profound!

   This morning I am not asking myself what did life make our children believe by those others around them, rather I am asking myself how did I present God to my children with my belief system?   I am not asking what did I do or what could I have done differently to influence our children?  Rather I am asking myself what I believed while I was given the responsibility and privilege of rearing three precious little souls.  Even more so, what do I believe today?

   Do I believe God or do I just think I do?  Yes, I believe He exists, yes I believe he is all knowing, all powerful and ever present.  I believe he in his mercy called to me, convicted me of my lost condition, and marvelously, wonderfully saved my soul and that I will live with him in eternity.  That I can nail down and hold on until I take my last breath.  The things that convict me are do I believe in prayer?  Do I really believe or do I put a clause in there, a loop hole, “if it is His will.” Do I teach my grandchildren and present by my life to my children and those around me a hope so, maybe so prayer life.  Most importantly do I believe in a hope so, maybe so life?  Did God really mean it when he said in Jeremiah 29:11-13?

   ¹¹ For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end. ¹² Then shall ye call upon me, and ye shall go and pray unto me, and I will hearken unto you. ¹³ And ye shall seek me, and find me, when ye shall search for me with all your heart.

  When I pray for someone that is sick, do I believe God for their healing?  Do I hope He will heal?  Why can I not believe He will heal and then let the remainder belong to God and leave it with Him?  Why do I bother to pray?  Why not just say, “God here is the prayer list, Do your will.”  Did God simply put Matthew 7:7-11 in scripture to trick us?

   ⁷ Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: ⁸ For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened. ⁹ Or what man is there of you, whom if his son ask bread, will he give him a stone? ¹⁰ Or if he ask a fish, will he give him a serpent? ¹¹ If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father which is in heaven give good things to them that ask him?

   I wonder if it is just possible the real reason my prayer life stinks, my belief system stinks, my living for God each day stinks, my victory in overcoming self, stinks;  just might be because my belief system stinks?  What fragrance enters the nostrils of God when I pray?  In one of the studies my mind and heart were impressed with something pertaining to fragrance, and that was when we leave a room that we leave a sweet smelling fragrance reaching up to the Father and to those who come in behind us.  For that reason, I always clean a motel room and leave it in order so that the maids will know there was someone who would show them respect and leave a sweet fragrance rather than disorder and a bad odor of uncleanliness  behind.  That may seem an honorable thing but today I am asking what fragrance or order, what belief system am I leaving behind for all to smell and see?

   What I lack and have always lacked in life has certainly not been my “WANT TO.”  I want to serve God, I want to be a difference in this world for God, I want to do great and marvelous things for God, I want to please God.  My want to is in full gear, it is that small tiny word that in reality is the biggest word in all of God’s word, “FAITH. “

   Today is the first day of the rest of my life.  As in “Anne of Green Gables, “ it is a new slate with no mistakes on it.  I cannot fix yesterday, not even this morning but I can reach up to God with my hands, with my whole heart, and ask, “God help thou my unbelief.”  I can pray and begin this very moment to do all in my power to believe in the scriptures, 2 Timothy 1:7-9

   ⁷ For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. ⁸ Be not thou therefore ashamed of the testimony of our Lord, nor of me his prisoner: but be thou partaker of the afflictions of the gospel according to the power of God; ⁹ Who hath saved us, and called us with an holy calling, not according to our works, but according to his own purpose and grace, which was given us in Christ Jesus before the world began,

   Thank you Lord for mercies that are fresh and new every morning.  Lamentations 3:19-26

¹⁹Remembering mine affliction and my misery, the wormwood and the gall. ²⁰ My soul hath them still in remembrance, and is humbled in me. ²¹ This I recall to my mind, therefore have I hope. ²² It is of the LORD’S mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. ²³ They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness. ²⁴ The LORD is my portion, saith my soul; therefore will I hope in him. ²⁵ The LORD is good unto them that wait for him, to the soul that seeketh him. ²⁶ It is good that a man should both hope and quietly wait for the salvation of the LORD.